Okay, so, my friend wants to drop out of school. Now. 2 months before he’d be finished for good. Why?

“I’m behind, and just don’t care anymore.”

Yeah. That’s it. As if he’s the only person to ever not care about school.

Hey, little secret: I’VE NEVER CARED EITHER. But I still do it. Why? Because it’ll be a hell of a lot harder if I don’t. And I told him it’ll be harder, and what does he say? “Meh.”

Meh, hm? We’ll see. Come back in 10 years and tell me it was “meh” for you.

[1:12 AM]

I feel like such a fanboy geek. My friend was complaining because he has nowhere to hide his weed that his mom won’t check, so I told him to buy a lupus textbook and put it in there, because it’s never lupus. XD

Well, I went to a gay dance with Dawn and Shay today. And they got me to actually dance… such as it is.
It was fun. Albeit slightly creepy at times. XD

Maaaayyyybbbbeeeeeee I’ll go again. Sometime. We shall see.

On a different note, I got my stuff today. The sleeve thing feels SO weird on my fingers. Bahahaha.

So, I went through my bank statements for the day it happened (January 11th, we found out). I DID have school that day until 11:30, and then I had lunch. So at the very earliest, I left school at 12:00, meaning I’d get home at 1:00 at the earliest. And then I looked, and lo-and-behold I spent $193 at Zellers that day. On what, you ask?

Why, that’s the day I bought my DS.

What time was this, you say?

1:47 pm. I have the receipt still. Now, it takes 15 minutes to drive from here to Zellers, meaning for me to be there I’d have to have left here at 1:30 at the latest, giving me 30 minutes to rob his house. Which is ridiculous.

Thus, at the earliest it was after 2 when I got home, with my Grandma, who I’d have gone out with. Most likely later.

Cam wins.

So, the neighbour up the street whose house was broken into in December or January while he was in Mexico came down to my house tonight, claiming first to my mom, then to me once she came and got me, he has pictures from security cameras with me on it.
Bull. Fucking. Shit.

First off, I’ve never even been NEAR his house. The closest I’ve ever been is on the road driving by, and MAYBE walked by on said road with the dogs once while going for a walk. Though it’s been a while since that happened.

Also, my mom and I aren’t able to see said pictures. I wonder why.

The police came to our house later that night (and I’m willing to bet everyone else on the street’s house), and told us what happened and asked if anyone had heard anything. If I remember right, they said it happened during the day, when my grandma was the only one home. She was home all day, since she couldn’t leave because of the snow.

So, let us show the problems with this so far:

1. My mom and I cannot see said pictures.

2. According to Chris, if the police had been told there were pictures of me or something, they’re obligated to ask me about it.

3. If my grandma was home and couldn’t go anywhere, I couldn’t either. The only way I’d get anywhere would be my Oma, who would come to get me, and I’d just leave right with her.

4. In December, I was working most of the time because there’s no school. In January, I’m gone from 8 – 3 on weekdays, and work on the weekends.

5. He claimed the tracks found match those of my car. My car that my grandma specifically said she couldn’t go anywhere with, and which I can’t drive alone. As such, if the car was gone, I’m PRETTY sure my grandma would have noticed. And if not at work or at school, I’d be with her while she’s visiting. Especially with no one else home, since I wouldn’t leave her home alone if I didn’t have to.

I’m pretty much positive there are no pictures. I think he just assumes I have something to do with it because I’m the only young guy in the area.

If he ever fucking comes near me, I’m calling the cops.

今日のよるに、今に、おおい哀しみがあるよ。　如何して？　如何して心の中へ僕は泣潰す事のように？

解からないよ。　判かったほうがいいだ。

～

君がほしいだ。　君が僕の哀しみのりゆうだ。

君のために生きたい。

～

震える僕は奇跡を信じていない。　幻がない僕が全てを信じているよ。

WE DON’T HATE YOU!

CHRIS!

HATE!

WE DON’T DO IT TO YOU!

On the off chance you even read this. XD On a slightly different note, wtf Britney Spears watching. o.o

Aaaaanywho, I feel better now. Not all emo and OMG WOE IS ME I SHIT RAZOR BLADES AND BLEEEEEEEEDDDDD. Though now, just as I feel better, half of my friends are depressed and sad and now I’m like omgwtfequinox? I wonder if I just feed off other people’s negative energy. Like when you laugh after someone falls down the stairs and ends up bent in some weird position. Like with their ear lodged in their ass and a foot where there was no foot before.

I, however, have a paper to write that is due a class earlier than I expected. I am not impressed, my friends. I am not impressed.

I need more friends that actually talk. D= Half of them are silent most of the time, and the other ones are Shay, Dawn, Danny, Alex, Andy, Kelvin, and Connor. And three of them don’t even live here. I bet I’d have more friends if I did drugs. Stupid me and my distaste for drugs. WHY COULDN’T I BE A CRACK HEAD. (Ew.)

Sometimes I get images of some person, anonymous, in the rain running toward nowhere in particular, but not away from anything, only striving to reach a destination that won’t be known until it’s found.

Sometimes I get images of some person, anonymous, in the wind on a mountain top crying over something I can’t understand and can’t hear and can’t see but can feel like it’s my own.

Sometimes you need to stand with your arms spread wide and look only at the sky [universe] and watch ghosts float overhead and bask in the clouded blue light until you smile again.

It’ll look only at you, you know.

Gestures [feelings] made can bring you to a place within you, a world within you, filled with your hopes and your demons and your own sky to sing you a lullaby in origami fields. Become the sun and moon and bring ebb and flow to your oceans.

Feel ripples and breaks in the ocean and bathe in the past and future, be the present and stand until you need to feel your own direction and move forward at your own flow.

Depend on no illusions. Live for yourself in the whole world or in your empty room [there are no people there], and it’s alright. But believe in miracles [everything].

This might seem like I’m spouting random gibberish, but I’m not. But if I explain it it defeats the purpose of writing it at all.